Once upon a time, a dysfunctional company in NY hired a new VP of Marketing. I’m going to call him Mancy, because that is only one letter from his real name.
This is the true story of how Mancy introduced himself to the company.
Mancy walks into a conference room packed with developers, product managers and marketing folk to talk about his new plans for our company’s positioning and growth. I’m excited. We’ve needed to expand our footprint and sales and he was a key hire to get that done.
Mancy’s first slide has 6 impressive corporate logos on it. Classic giants of tech: IBM. Cisco. EMC. Accenture. Datatel. Oracle. “What do all of these companies have in common?” he booms. The room starts guessing.
“Fortune 500 companies?” – Plausible, he admits, but incorrect.
“They are all technology firms that experienced huge growth?” – True again, he says, but not it.
“They are all valued at over a billion dollars?” – The VP says no.
He clicks to the next slide. It is a picture of him, in a suit. This is the great reveal.
“I was an executive at all of these companies.”
We sat there silently. Over 15 years later, I can’t remember a thing about whatever occurred for the rest of that meeting. But I’ll never forget what an asshole he was in those first five minutes. He never recovered from this presentation in his short tenure at the company.
Here’s the deal – when you arrive at a new company, you are a blank slate. Even those who interviewed and hired you don’t truly know your worth. You are a calculated risk that has been taken.
- Have 15 years experience in the industry? We don’t care.
- Worked for Apple and Google? We don’t care.
- Went to Harvard business school? We don’t care.
- Have “Vice President” in your title? We don’t care.
Bragging about your past is like bragging about your dick. Maybe its awesome, maybe not. But if you talk about it all the time, it’s fair to assume you have serious insecurities.
At a new job, you must prove your worth. You must earn respect. Nothing is freely given, and anyone who automatically kisses your ass because of where you went to school, where you worked in the past, or what title sits on your business card is an idiot.
I’m sure there are companies out there with lots of idiots. Keep telling them how awesome you are or how your past accomplishments warrant their respect. Smart people know you are committing a logical fallacy. They will expect compelling arguments to support well thought out positions.
Unfortunate exception: Executives can cheat the system.
For us commoners, the first six months on the job are all about earning respect from the ground up. This is why changing jobs is such a pain in the ass. Executives can shortcut the whole process and just fire anyone who doesn’t give them instant respect, then bring in their own people. The remaining staff will then fall in line out of fear, or leave.
New on the job? Don’t talk about the old job.
This is probably worth a formal code # of its own. No one cares about how another company operates. It is very weird and counterintuitive, since it is a great source of untapped knowledge that every new employee brings to the table. My guess is people just like to think their situation and company is a unique snowflake. Whatever the reason, never use the sentence structure “At my old company ABC we did yada yada yada.” People hate it. Instead, remember you earn trust by being capable and mature. All of your past experiences are now part of the overall knowledge you bring to the table and can offer as solutions. Don’t shoot yourself in the foot and give that old place the credit.